Stoke on Trent to San Francisco

Wednesday 11th April 2012

I'm writing this on the plane. I won't bore you with details of our journey to the airport, as it was uneventful and totally unblogworthy.

There is a bit of a fuss today in the newspapers about the lack of border control in the UK. After going through the airport this morning, I'm wondering if there is actually some truth in the Daily Mail for once. My passport has barely been looked at and no one asked us the all important questions about whether we'd packed our own bags and is there a bomb in them until we were about to board the plane, which was a bit late really. And then I don't think they were really listening to our answers However, we did see another passenger being escorted off by a man wearing latex gloves! He's back on the flight now though, so I assume that either he didn't have anything hidden in his body cavities, or that he managed to convince the customs official that it really was his wife who packed his case, and not a member of Al Qaeda.

We're expecting a far more robust approach upon entering the USA. Claire is worrying about the baby oil stains on her passport, which usually raise some eyebrows. Hopefully it won't be as scary as the brief stopover in China last year.

The flight is 11 hours. Fortunately, our seats seem to have been upgraded to some with 5" of extra leg room! Never in my life has 5" seemed so big, as we are stretched out quite comfortably and can still feel our legs even after over an hour on the plane. There don't seem to be many Americans on the plane. Either that, or they're just very quiet, which I doubt.

Assuming we are allowed into America, we are spending our first two nights in San Francisco. We have chosen the hotel almost entirely because it has a very friendly resident cat called Pip who likes to make himself comfortable in guest's bedrooms. And they serve complimentary cookies.

We're not quite sure what to expect from this trip. There are a few things that we're a bit apprehensive about. The main one is guns, and watching Thelma and Louise last night did nothing to ease our concerns. There are even instructions on the Internet on how to avoid getting shot by the police if they pull you over for speeding etc. Apparently you must not get out of the car or make sudden movements, and you should keep your hands visible at all times. Probably best to avoid being pulled over in the first place.

We've arrived safely at Pip's hotel. We got here at about 7pm local time and decided to have a power nap before going for dinner. It's now 11pm (7am UK time) and we never made it to dinner. Claire is flat out in bed, and I can't sleep. Don't know why because I've hardly slept all day. I'm hoping to be overcome with tiredness at any moment and thought I'd write a bit more while I'm waiting.

Our passage through customs/immigration was smooth, and unhindered by the baby oil. We did have to have our fingerprints scanned before we were allowed in to the country though.

We caught a tube train thing called a BART from the airport. When we emerged from the station we were greeted by a pack of bible bashers with placards, and a collection of drunks/tramps, all of whom tried to befriend us whilst we were looking at the map. One was particularly pushy, claiming to be "the man with the knowledge", and we had to walk purposefully up a side street, pretending we knew where we were going to get away from him. Fortunately, it turned out to be in more or less the right direction, and after dragging our bags up one of San Francisco's many hills, we arrived at the hotel. We were pleased to see that Pip was there to greet us, although he was a little distracted by a white dog and didn't have time for much fuss. We are hoping he'll pay us a visit tomorrow. Worryingly, the white dog is identical to the one that caused Claire to fall down a step in Portugal last year and almost break her ankle. I shall have to keep a careful eye on her.

Tomorrow we're going to have a good look round the city and hopefully eat more food than today.